Congratulations Meemaw!

It was a great day this last weekend. My grandson decided I would get to see his special place when we went fishing. I have one grandson and 4 granddaughters, all of which I enjoy equally. I went with the grandchildren to this spot fishing and yes the children were there too, after all I guess I needed the kids to get the grandkids. Not all of them this day but 4 of the 5 and 2 of my 3 so as far as percentages went in my book that was pretty good.

It was not too far of a hike back to the river and no one told me about the rocks you had to shimmy down to get DOWN to the river? So as I shimmied down the rocks, did I mention DOWN? I was very nervous about this part, I have a bit of a clumsy streak, and I held breath hoping I would make it to the bottom without need of a medivac lift out. My grandson was already at the bottom, first one there waiting for me to arrive. He said, “Congratulations Meemaw”. I had never heard him say anything like this before. It made me smile so big. He was obviously pleased I had come to his beach area on the river, he loves that spot, and he had talked about it to me many times. He went there the previous year and I had not been able to go due to my health. This time, not the case. Here I was available for him and off we went. He showed me around his private little beach (not really private). He stopped though as we got to the area that he was used to because things just didn’t look the same. I could see this right away because I had seen many pictures from the previous time and had memorized the lay of the land on the beach just not the trail to get to the beach area. There had been recent heavy rains that had caused flood damage widespread in our area and it had really tore up the beach and still the waters had not receded enough to uncover his favored rocks.  There were still some trees down on the beach and lots of dead branches and roots still in the ground in sand. Trash laying around and clutter.

(Mom ‘aka’ Auntie explains why the water is higher and clutter and trees are down to children around her)

By this time the rest of the crew had arrived with us and we all assured him we could pick up and clear it up some to make it more comfortable and that it was only because of the water that it looked different. It would go back eventually to the water level he was used to when the river returned to normal and although the beach would not look the same due to the trees the rocks would be there again. We picked up the trash and put it in bags we had and put chairs out to sit on and he took a while to calm down and settle but he did settle in after a bit. It took me a while to settle in as well due to knowing he was agitated and I cannot settle if the children aren’t settled and the grandchildren are restless. When things are disorganized and children are unhappy I am distressed and agitated, not to mention sand is an issue for me, one I was overcoming for my grandson and didn’t mention to him. This sand is soft which was good.

I sat and watched my grandson as he dealt with a myriad of issues that day. His Autism is moderate to severe (mine is moderate) and he has Amniotic Band Syndrome, which resulted in his right hand not having fingers when he was born. Couple that with Autism and he does not want a prosthetic, or does but can’t handle the texture of one or the feeling of having it on.  Add into that, he lost his grandfather just a few months ago. They were very close and he used to come here with him, they would go on nature walks whenever they would go fishing together or hiking together or anywhere outdoors together and find snails or turtles or things like that. His grandfather and he were both very much into going on walks in the woods together and they bonded close and when he passed away it broke his heart and he has not been the same since then which has broken my heart.  When my grandson was little he never would touch a tree, or grass or a plant. It took him years to be able to do it, so this was truly a huge loss to him – he does not let people in easily and he does not try new things easily. But he is so brave and so loyal and so loving.

He handled the area not looking the same pretty well, then he handled the fact that there was a snake near the area and that got announced by his father. He and I do not like those snakes very much. Both of us were very agitated for a while. He got over that faster than I did. I paced much longer than he did. {Laughing out loud at myself while I’m typing}. He is forming a new bond with his other grandfather which I am glad he is doing. His other grandfather is not used to being in touch with his emotions very much and is learning to do this as a person and then with his grandchildren. I think this is terrific and he is doing a great job. He spent time with his grandson digging in the sand and playing with him which made him happy and he was laughing and I have no clue what they were talking about when they said something about the “foot” but yeah they dug something out. All I know is he was smiling and that was terrific. The others were in the water playing and he was watching them and looking at it like he was thinking about it. I was looking at it like no way am I doing that, the last time I did that I fell on a snake and two time in a row, NO WAY AGAIN, NO THANK YOU, NOT GONNA GET IN THERE NOPE.  But my grandson, he had different plans.

Next thing I know here he goes, he gets his mom and she looks at me and smiles and says ok Mom its time he wants to. I get my camera out and start the pictures going. Had to get it on the camera. I wanted to see him do it, how amazing it was to behold as he went out into the water, right out into the river with his mom. No he didn’t just jump right in. That would be a neurotypical child likely like the oldest who got right in. He cautiously with his Mothers help got in slowly one toe at a time, then one foot, then one leg and then one toe at a time and the next foot and the next leg and then on from there, and eventually he was in, and he was walking slowly headed for a rock where his sister and cousin were sitting, he was going to go there and sit with them and his mom. And I am sitting in a chair on the sand with my camera, watching my 7 year old grandson able to go in a river and do this thing and overcome his issues, what an amazing boy he is, and sure enough there he was, he made it to that rock. I told myself if he did I would go there too.

Meemaw, ” and afore-mentioned famous mother, and Bravest Grandson on ROCK …. TOGETHER!!!!!!

So I got up and prepared myself mentally and emotionally for what was coming. I knew I was going to hate what I felt on my legs when I sank down into the river. I had water shoes on, but I knew I would feel things on my legs. It would really be bad for a bit, but I could do it, I could get through it, I knew I could, if he could do it, that brave, loyal and loving boy, then I could do it too. So with help from my family I got into that river, I hated everything I felt on my legs, trying very hard not to think about anything that might be down there swimming or biting or thinking about biting and I stopped and waited and then kept on going while I looked at my grandson and smiled at him each time I thought I wanted to go back. When I got to that rock, I told him, “you are my inspiration, you are the reason I could do this. Thank you for giving me that reason. You are brave and I love you, thank you for bringing me to your beach and your rock”.

Congratulations

Grandson!